The Sun as my Comforter

My daily rhythm is such that the first thing I do in the morning, after feeding my birds and squirrels ;-), is going for a walk. No matter what the weather holds. Whether it is freezing cold like today with a temperature of 10 below that freezing point, whether it is pouring rain or whether I get blessed with beauty with in gorgeous clear blue sky. 

What makes me use the word ‘blessed’ when I speak of the clear skies, and not when I speak of blustery weather?  

Let me tell you, that is actually a thing of the past. I have grown to see beauty in all weather circumstances. And today I realized something, I realized why I walk. 

I live a life where I suffer certain circumstances. I often find myself in pain, and when I get up after a night that lacks sleep, and put on layers of clothing, I am going out with a certain amount of curiosity. What will I find out there today? Which Grace will I meet? 

Today it was in the sunrise. I live in a small neighborhood with houses close to one another. Some properties have huge trees. I walked with the sun still making her way up from the earth, when all of a sudden I was struck by bright and blinding sunlight. What I did not realize is that the sun had already made her way up into our existence. Something I could not see for the houses blocking any view. When I passed a small clearing, the sun hit me brightly. It took me by surprise. I kept walking in the bright light knowing that at the end of the street I could see her fully, together with many footprints of deer in the snow. It’s a place where I usually pause and breathe deeply to take it all in. It is cold and I realize I have to keep moving. I don’t want to let go of the moment of standing in the bright sun that tells me “I am seen”. I have to turn my back to the sun and keep going to stay warm. Reluctantly I turn around only to quickly sense that the sun is still on me, though not on my face. My face starts smiling and it does not leave me for the remainder of the walk. I am captured by my smile. What makes me smile? 

I realize the sun comes in all sorts of ways. When she is not in my face, she is showing me she’s got my back! When she is to my right, I notice she creates my shadow to my left as to say: “See yourself today.” There was a moment the clouds stole her away. She was covered, and I got colder. I shiffered. Soon enough, the clouds went on their way, and the sun re-appeared, together with her warmth. 

The sun holds promise. Her rise and her setting. She shows me the faithfulness of God. No matter how I feel, and what I go through, the sun rises, and the sun sets, both she does in spectacular ways with no day ever being the same. This is why I keep walking, no matter what weather I have to overcome. I keep walking, especially, when I don’t sense anything, or when I sense the dark. I let the yellow and the red of the sun bring me comfort. 

When I don’t feel well, when I hurt, when my circumstances drag my soul into the dark, I don’t shorten my walk, no, I go on an extended walk. With the sun being my steady friend. I let my feet be my prayers. This is my anchor. Now desolation has some color. This is Grace.