Welcome…

Welcome… It’s a word I have been sitting with since November. It is that time of year when words usually start popping up for the next year. I start paying attention to what word might find me to lean into in the year to come. The Practice is called One Word.

This word Welcome seemed to have an invitation for me right away, though very difficult and somewhat confronting.

I have a tendency to want to control things. I don’t mind people taking care of me, in fact, I can clearly ask for help when I need it but… it is really hard for me when people give to me out of their own initiative. I have been paying attention to that for years. And last year I had a very special friend become more to me, like family. I am not in a relationship with any of my family members so one could say that it is a huge gift when this person moved from friendship into the role of a family member/caregiver. It is and at the same time, it is a very painful experience for me.

I have taken care of myself really well from an early age on, especially emotionally. And leaning into another actually makes me wobble. It makes me feel unsafe. And so when the word Welcome presented itself to me, I instantly thought God was pressing into more healing for me. That is was good to embrace this word and that it means leaning into this person.

And I tried., very hard. And I struggled a lot. And then the word started to fade. I realized I have limitations; what if this was just too hard for me? And I started to think that the word Welcome was something I had made up. I really wanted the change; I really longed to be in a place where receiving is easy. And I have never minded a challenge, I have always worked hard at my healing. But I was hitting a wall, and I spent time at that wall (my spiritual director helped me hang out there as well.) 

I would not have expected to celebrate a word like Limitations, especially when that word meant I have limitations. During a spiritual direction session, everything shifted when I started to embrace that perhaps, I could not do this something with this person, for it was just triggering so much. Too much? I was okay with having limitations, and I walked out a different person from that session.

So I started to hold that word more loosely. Until this weekend, when I was processing with a wonderful group of people, something started to make sense. This word Welcome, I had given it meaning. I had filled in that it meant that I would welcome in this person and pretty much any person I was trying to control in terms of how much and when (s)he could give to me (husband 😉), all because it would lead to healing.

What if this word held mystery, mystery that would unfold over the course of the year? It wasn’t until this weekend that I realized that this word could mean so much more. Perhaps this word wasn’t just about welcoming others’ actions; it could mean I welcome my limitations. This word could actually mean a big fat Welcome to myself, as I am, where I am.

Let’s just say that the word landed again in new ways. So yes, this is my One Word for the year. I no longer give it meaning, It will hold so much more than I can imagine. and I hold it with an open hand (hes the photo, a symbol I created to remind me this year).

Would you like to engage with the spiritual practice of One Word?

Some of the gifts of living with One Word

1. See your One Word as a companion for the year, a fried

2. .Your One Word can shape / transform you

3. It can give you hope for the year

The Steps

1. Start by finding a quiet place where distractions are few. Sit silently.

   ~ Acknowledge your desire for your word to be spoken to you.

   ~ Voice to God the desire to receive your word.

   ~ Practice surrender and detachment from any word in particular.

2. Ask God to speak to you to help you answer these questions:

   ~ What do I need? Which is very different from what I want. What areas of my life need change and why?

   ~ What is the desire underneath? Perhaps you long for something to nourish you or maybe you don’t mind a word you can wrestle with and grow into.

   ~ What might be in my way?: What am I resisting? What am I avoiding? Know that resisting something might point you to the word you actually need.

3. Pay attention: More likely than not, you do not land on your One Word over the course of one day.

   ~ Decide to pay attention over the next few days or weeks. Pay attention during the mundane of life to words that pop up in various places: through conversations, in nature, through signs along the road, in your dreams. The list is endless.

   ~ Engage in mindless journaling: set your timer for 10 minutes, then quiet yourself and without much thinking write! When you are finished see if you can discover a theme.

   ~ Engage in some arts or crafts and pay attention to what unfolds.

   ~ Engage in a Lectio Diviina. What word stands out for you there?

4. Once you realize you have been found by your One Word:

   1. Have your word in front of you throughout the year: find a mug with your word on it, hang pos-its on your mirror, set a screensaver on your phone.

   2. Share your word with others who also live with this practice. You can plan to meet once a month and process.

   3. Keep noticing the effects of your One Word. You might want to mark your calendar once a month and journal with the following prompts: 

      • How is your Word shaping you? 

      • What is challenging? 

      • How is it nourishing you? 

      • What is life-giving about your word?